


Sporksuzen

by QueenTzahra, SilverServerError



Category: xxxHoLic
Genre: Absurd, Fanfiction of Fanfiction, Fluff and Crack, Fluff and Smut, Hand Jobs, M/M, Meta, My First Work in This Fandom, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-15
Updated: 2016-09-15
Packaged: 2018-08-15 04:32:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,613
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8042740
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenTzahra/pseuds/QueenTzahra, https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverServerError/pseuds/SilverServerError
Summary: Yuuko has to grant an usual wish for a customer, so of course she pulls in Doumeki and Watanuki to help her. It's always wonderful when wishes are granted, especially when it wasn't something you knew you wished for in the first place!





	Sporksuzen

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [The Masked Enigma](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6854158) by [SilverServerError](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverServerError/pseuds/SilverServerError). 



> So... does anyone besides me remember sporking?
> 
> For those of you who missed that glorious blip in 2007, sporking used to mean reading a badfic, then writing your answer to it with the characters from it all reading it and making fun of it. Or just feeling horrified. Think like, The Ember Island Players from Avatar type of stuff.
> 
> Anyway, I was talking to my wonderful and talented friend SilverServerError about this and she asked me to spork one of her fics. Of course, there's not a lot to be mean about in her work, so I had to go another direction.
> 
> Um, not much else to say, enjoy this piece of utter absurdity.

“What was that about, Yuuko-san?” Watanuki asked, apron on and feather duster in hand as he adjusted something in the treasure room. Yuuko leaned against the doorframe, an excited smile on her face.

“A customer!” She said, and Watanuki clenched the feather duster more tightly; he didn’t like how eager she seemed.

“What do I have to do?” He asked, preemptively, and she laughed appreciatively.

“Cook something delicious for dinner, some kind of finger food will do, and don’t forget the liquor!” She added, dire warning in her voice. Watanuki rolled his eyes. 

“You can fire me the day I forget your booze, Yuuko-san,” he sighed, and she laughed. She turned to go, then paused, her smile widening in a most unnerving way.

“Call Doumeki too, we’ll need him here for this,” she said.

“Why him?! Why not Himawari-chan?!” Watanuki growled, returning to his dusting with an unnecessary ferocity. Yuuko’s smile only widened.

“You’ll thank me later, trust me.”

A few hours later, Watanuki laid out a fabulous spread on a picnic blanket in Yuuko’s back garden. She, Maru, Moro and Mokona sat around it, drinks in hand, looking excited. Watanuki sat with his arms and legs crossed, watching them resentfully. Doumeki still wasn’t there, which was _so_ annoying. He had some nerve, really! “Sorry I’m late.” Everyone looked up and saw Doumeki hurrying towards them, still in his school uniform. “Practice ran late.” He sat down next to Watanuki, who sniffed irritably.

“Well there’s still plenty of food for your ungrateful self to steal, so I wouldn’t worry about it!” He said, contemptuously.

“I wasn’t planning on it,” Doumeki assured him. “Pour me some sake.” Watanuki clenched his teeth and poured him a glass, trying to impart as much hate as he could into the act.

“Now everyone’s here, we can begin!” Yuuko said, watching Watanuki hand Doumeki the glass with that same unnerving smile on her face. “Maru, Moro, will you go get the projector from the treasure room?”

“Yes, mistress!” The pair of them sprang to their feet and hurried back inside, chanting, “PROJECTOR! PROJECTOR!” at the tops of their voices. 

“What exactly are we doing?” Doumeki asked, sipping his drink. 

“Granting a wish for a customer,” Yuuko replied, reaching behind her and retrieving what looked like a manuscript. “Though truthfully I’m outsourcing this one.”

“To who?” Watanuki asked, curious in spite of himself. Yuuko just smiled.

“Someone in another world,” she said, sipping her sake. “You both met her a _long_ time ago, but we lost track of her for a while.” Doumeki and Watanuki looked at each other, perplexed, but Yuuko just smiled and drank more sake.

“PROJECTOR! PROJECTOR!” Maru and Moro called as they hurried across the garden, carrying an old-fashioned film projector with them. They set it down next to Yuuko and she loaded the manuscript into it. Immediately it clicked into life, shining light across the garden, apparently onto an invisible screen.

“Is everyone comfortable?” Yuuko asked, and Doumeki and Watanuki exchanged another curious look. Then Doumeki shrugged, which made Watanuki cringe in anger.

“We’re comfortable, mistress!” Maru and Moro sang, and Mokona jumped up. 

“Mokona will do the honors! Presenting: _The Masked Enigma_ by SilverServerError!” Yuuko cheered and Maru and Moro joined in enthusiastically. Watanuki just watched in great trepidation, no idea what was coming.

_He holds Doumeki’s hand nervously as he guides him back to the bedroom._

Watanuki choked on his sake and Doumeki raised his eyebrows. “WHAT IS THIS, YUUKO-SAN?!” Watanuki demanded, glaring at her and going furiously red. Yuuko just laughed and swirled her drink around.

“What do you think, Doumeki-kun?” She asked, tilting her head to the side. Doumeki drank more sake, but said nothing.

“Cheers, Yuko-san!” Mokona cried, and they clinked their glasses together.

_It’s too soon. He’s not ready for this. And honestly he doesn’t think Doumeki is either. But he knows if he doesn’t share this part of himself soon, he is going to lose him._

_Blue eyes glance fleetingly over his shoulder to catch Doumeki’s gaze, then turn away quickly. Doumeki’s obviously still angry with him. But Watanuki can-_ _is going_ _to fix this._

 _Doumeki is special. He’s kind and patient and_ _really_ _cares about him. Watanuki will do whatever it takes._

“YUUKO-SAN!” Watanuki screamed across the blanket, incandescent with fury, and again she just laughed. Next to him, Doumeki covered his ears, which made Watanuki even angrier. “AND YOU! WHY AREN’T YOU SAYING ANYTHING?!”

“Only idiots get this upset about fanfiction,” Doumeki said, bluntly, sipping sake.

“Idiots! Idiots!” Maru and Moro sang.

“Idiots and people who can actually write,” Yuuko said, quietly. Watanuki continued to seethe with rage, but he kept silent, waiting to see what came next.

_Even if Yuuko might kill him if she finds out._

_No. Scratch that._

_She_ _will_ _kill him_ _when_ _she finds out. Or maybe worse, fire him. But, he has to draw the line somewhere right? The thought is a cold comfort as he reaches his goal._

“For the record, I wouldn’t actually kill you for this,” Yuuko said with a wink.

“Be quiet,” Doumeki told Watanuki preemptively, and he clenched his fists.

_“I… Doumeki.” This was so much harder than he had thought it would be. “I haven’t been being entirely honest with you. There’s something you should know.”_

“Oh, we’ve switched to past tense!” Mokona observed.

_He grips the closet door. It’s now or never._

“Never mind, back to present!” Mokona amended, drinking sake.

_He pushes it open and changes both of their lives forever._

_The lighting has switched on as it always does, illuminating the small room and the hanging body suit and armor. It shines like black leather under the light. The boots are lined up neatly beneath it. The mask, gloves and belt sit on their pedestal to the right._

“Is this a superhero AU or a BDSM AU?” Doumeki asked Yuuko, genuinely curious.

“Why not both?” Yuuko asked, grinning.

“YUUKO-SAN!” Watanuki couldn’t help but feel relieved, though, if this was the reason he’d brought Doumeki to his bedroom, well… It could have been way worse.

_He’s inspecting every detail of the suit like it’s the first time, because the alternative is to see how Doumeki is taking this and the pressure is just too high._

_“You wear this?” Doumeki’s voice is carefully flat. (Or at least that’s how Watanuki thinks of it. It’s simply not possible that that calm is authentic, right?)_

_“When I’m with the Mistress.” Watanuki confirms._

_Doumeki’s hand holds his a little tighter and they finally look at each other, solemn. “I’m a…” And Watanuki falters. He’s never said it out loud before. But Doumeki is nodding, having finally figured it out. It lends Watanuki strength when they speak it together._

_“A superhero.” “A fetishist.”_

“You were right,” Doumeki told Yuuko, toasting her, and she flashed him a winning smile.

“A superhero! A fetishist!” Maru and Moro sang, clapping excitedly. Watanuki cried out in anguish and fell forward, clutching his head with his hands.

“At least Kunogi isn’t here,” Doumeki told him, his tone still blunt as ever.

“WILL YOU SHUT UP?!” Watanuki yelled from the ground, though he had to admit Doumeki had a point. If Himawari-chan saw this, he’d probably die of shame.

_It’s like hitting a brick wall, except the brick wall hits you, except the brick wall is Doumeki being stupid._

_“Excuse me?” he sputters._

_“Is that not…” Doumeki raises an eyebrow, looking deadpan back to the suit. “Is that not where you were going with this?”_

_“No. The Mistress and I- you know Mistress Swallowtail, right?”_

_“Who?”_

_“You’ve never heard of her? Mistress Swallowtail.” At the blank look on his face, Watanuki keeps going. “The Frozen Phoenix. Black Steel. Is none of this ringing a bell to you? The Guardians of Fate?”_

_“Are they… a band?” Doumeki hazards._

_“NO! They’re- **I**  am a superhero, you… you thick, frustrating, painfully slow on the uptake piece of-“ At the last moment Watanuki wrestles himself into seething silence. _

“Sounds like you,” Doumeki said, and Watanuki was surprised Doumeki couldn’t feel all the hatred he was sending his way.

_He hits a switch by the door and the walls break into panels and spin, his arsenal and equipment laid out on dozens of brushed steel shelves and lit by the glowing panels that back the entire false wall system._

_Doumeki watches, eyes uncharacteristically wide. Slowly they return to normal but at least now he has the idiot’s attention._

_“Is this why you’ve been standing me up?”_

_“YES. OBVIOUSLY.”_

_“Because you’ve been out fighting crime?”_

_“More or less.”_

_“Isn’t that dangerous?”_

_“Well, yeah. But we help people. Danger is kind of in the job description.”_

_Doumeki raises an eyebrow. “We?”_

_“Swallowtail and I. We’re a team. I help her out. She’s sort of the main offense and I run support. Watch her back and stuff.”_

_“You’re her sidekick?”_

“Sidekick! Sidekick! Watanuki’s a sidekick!” Maru and Moro sang, pointing at the screen.

“WE’RE ON A TEAM, THE FIC SAID!” Watanuki yelled, his arms flailing pointlessly.

“I just call it like I see it,” Doumeki said, dryly.

“Doumeki-kun is always astute,” agreed Mokona.

_The distaste on Watanuki’s face is immediate. “Ugh! No! Are you kidding me? Why would you even say that? You know what? Don’t speak. It makes you sound stupid.”_

_Yes. Yes he was her sidekick._

“See? It’s easier if you don’t fight it, Watanuki-kun,” Yuuko said, smiling.

_But he wouldn’t be forever. Once he was past his probationary period, they all promised he’d move up in the ranks._

_“So what’s your superhero name, boy wonder?”_

_He frowns. “The Masked Enigma.”_

“Watanuki-sama, The Masked Enigma!” Watanuki said proudly, standing up and clutching his chest.

“Sounds like an ironic superhero show on Adult Swim from ten years ago,” Doumeki said.

“WHAT DO YOU KNOW?!”

_Doumeki just hisses a sympathetic wince._

“Awkward,” Yuuko muttered.

_“SHUT UP.”_

_He doesn’t but at least he changes the subject, finally stepping forward to give the suit a closer look. “Is that a corset?”_

_Watanuki balks. “No! It’s tactical body amour. If it’s not tight like that someone can grab it and it becomes a liability.”_

_“It still looks like a corset.”_

_“It’s KEVLAR!”_

Everyone laughed. “Did Watanuki-kun just say something actually funny?” Yuuko asked, looking around at Doumeki and Mokona.

“Even broken clocks are right twice a day,” Doumeki said, shrugging.

“I HATE BOTH OF YOU!”

_“It’s kind of kinky.”_

“NO!” Watanuki interjected.

_And when their eyes meet for a moment, Doumeki has that look._

_For all that Doumeki is quiet, reserved, subtle (such a nice counterpoint to his own personality, really)… Occasionally he is tactlessly blatant about what he wants._

_Watanuki hides his burning face behind his hands. What had he done that was so terrible as to deserve this?_

_“I like your mask too.” It’s a single strip of stiff black fabric, perfectly sculpted to sit across the bone structure of his eyes and the bridge of his nose. Watanuki peeks between his fingers to find Doumeki holding it, bending it experimentally._

_Oh good, Watanuki thinks sarcastically. At least he likes the mask._

_Doumeki pulls him closer, and holds up the fabric questioningly. Watanuki huffs but takes off his glasses without comment and places them on the pedestal. Doumeki sets the mask in place and ties the ends around the back of Watanuki’s head. It’s striking. Pale skin, dark fabric and deep blue eyes. “I like how this looks on you.”_

“YES, GET IT DOUMEKI-KUN!” Yuuko cheered, and Maru and Moro applauded excitedly.

“Shut up!” Watanuki told them, angrily, but felt heat rise in his face all the same. He knew Doumeki was watching him and turned away, avoiding his stare completely.

 _The heat in his voice is subtle, but Watanuki is absolutely sure he hears it._  

“Ooh, that’s _sexy_ ,” Yuuko breathed.

_He rolls his eyes where the mask now frames them._

_“Put the corset on.”_

_“It’s not a corset. It’s armor.”_

_Doumeki pulls on his wrists, making Watanuki stumble forward so they now stand flush chest to chest. The shorter has to crane his neck a little to see him. “I want to see you in it.” It growls through Doumeki’s chest in a way Watanuki can feel as well as hear._

_Maybe it’s the bravado of the mask. Or the stress of revealing his secret. Maybe it’s just because it’s been a really long day. But Watanuki is really at the end of his patience. If Doumeki wants to see him in his suit so bad, he can open a newspaper like everyone else. Seriously, does this guy live under a rock?_

_“No.” Watanuki frowns. “You didn’t even ask nicely.”_

“Demon bride Watanuki!” Mokona cried, looking fearful, and Watanuki threw his empty sake glass at him. He opened his mouth and swallowed it whole. “So mean!”

“Syaoran and the others will be very confused,” Yuuko said, amused, but Mokona just reached for the sake. She eyed Doumeki for a second, wondering what he was thinking, but he remained silent.

_It’s then that Doumeki hoists him up, arms around his waist, and backs him swiftly into a wall._

“Someone’s shoved up against a wall, it’s all over now!” Yuuko exclaimed, looking thrilled.

“Up against a wall! Up against a wall!” Yuuko eyed Doumeki and Watanuki, who were both watching the story, wide eyed and silent.

_“What are you doing!?”_

_“Asking nicely.”_

_And then Doumeki is upon him. Broad hands slip under his shirt and up his chest while a thigh pushes firmly between his legs._

“Yuuko-san!” Watanuki cried, though his anger was tempered by his obvious embarrassment.

“Yes?” She asked him, grinning, but Watanuki had no idea what he actually wanted to say.

“Hey,” came Doumeki’s voice from behind him.

“MY NAME’S NOT HEY!” Watanuki snapped, turning around to finally look Doumeki in the face. They locked eyes, and Watanuki felt heat rush up his neck. He wanted to say something hateful, but his voice seemed to have deserted him.

“You’re blocking the screen.”

“SHUT UP!”

_“Doumeki!” He protests shrilly. “You can’t just-“_

_But then Doumeki sucks hard at the base of his neck and a thumb drags across his left nipple. Before he can stop himself, he ruts deliciously against the pressure between his legs and frankly Doumeki can do whatever the hell he wants._

“That’s all it took? Watanuki is too easy!” Mokona teased, looking almost disappointed.

“Never underestimate the power of ultra-sensitive fanfiction nipples,” Yuuko replied, sagely.

“The power of what?” Doumeki asked, genuinely curious. Watanuki growled in humiliated fury and clutched the sides of his face.

“It’s a fanfiction trope,” Yuuko said, smiling against the rim of her sake glass. “I haven’t seen it in a long time, though, it feels so retro!” Doumeki nodded thoughtfully.

“I guess idiots are easily excited,” he said, then covered his ears for the impending explosion.

“I AM NOT!” Doumeki let go of his ears and refilled his glass of sake.

“I’m assuming you’re referring to getting excited that easily, seeing as your idiocy is a universal constant.”

“SHUT UP! AND EVEN IF I WERE IT WOULD ONLY BE FOR HIMAWARI-CHAN!” Doumeki just shrugged, and Watanuki cried out in frustration before turning away. He couldn’t stand to look at Doumeki, even if it meant he had to keep watching the fanfiction.

_Watanuki’s head falls back against the wall and each pant of his breath is tinged with a whine as Doumeki rocks against him. He cries out and screws his eyes shut as the touch turns into a pinch._

_“Fuck!”_

_His arms come up to drag Doumeki away from his neck, intent on giving him a lecture, but when he sees the expression on his face, any thought of that disappears. He pulls him into a kiss instead, nipping at a lip, sucking hard on his tongue._

“NO!” Watanuki screamed in utter devastation, curling into a humiliated ball of rage. Yuuko and Mokona cheered and clinked their glasses together.

“Kiss! Kiss! Watanuki kissed Doumeki!” Maru and Moro sang, and the words made Watanuki’s skin crawl. He uncurled himself and shook his fists across the blanket.

“STOP IT!” He screamed at them, anger boiling inside him.

“It’s just a kiss,” Doumeki said, shrugging.

“HOW CAN YOU BE SO CALM?”

“Only idiots get this upset about fanfiction,” he reminded him, sipping sake. “Besides, you’re the one who started it.” Watanuki flushed in a fresh surge of anger; he couldn’t even argue, Doumeki was completely right. He turned back to watch, determinedly avoiding everyone’s eye.

_But it’s not enough. Even the pressure and the heat and the speed. It’s not enough and soon he’s dragging down at Doumeki’s shoulders, hoping he’ll get the message._

_And he does. To an extent._

_About a week ago_

“About a week ago?! We’ve done this BEFORE?!” Watanuki cried out in horror.

“Obviously, have you not been paying attention?” Doumeki told him, bluntly.

_Doumeki discovered how much it drove Watanuki crazy when he teased the skin just below his hipbone and along the crease where thigh met pelvis. He’d been using that knowledge mercilessly ever since. A thumb slips below Watanuki’s waistband and across the bone, massaging firm circles into his skin and sending little waves of desire through his core._

Watanuki’s stomach muscles pulled in and up and he let out the smallest of sharp exhales. To his utter horror and confusion, he felt the tiniest shoot of excitement; he knew exactly how sensitive he was there, how much he’d longed to be touched there. Of course he’d always imagined Himawari-chan doing it, but- no! No no no. He hated watching this and he hated Yuuko-san for making him and he hated Doumeki for existing! He hugged his knees into his chest and rested his chin on them, glowering at the screen.

 _Then with barely any resistance, he drags down, pulling along the hem of his activewear trousers. (They’re not yoga pants. Watanuki has told him at length that they’re_ _not_ _yoga pants)._

“Are they yoga pants, Watanuki-kun?” Yuuko teased, but Watanuki said nothing, his eyes fixed moodily on the screen. She looked at Doumeki, whose eyes were fixed on Watanuki, and smiled softly to herself.

_The pale expanse of delicate skin is exposed, so many blue tinted veins visible in a network just below the thin surface. The barest trail of dark hair leads off to the side, further down. Doumeki’s tan hand wraps around him, fingers griping into the lower curve of his buttocks, into the very top of his thigh, while his thumb teases back and forth, slipping deeper into the material and running along that tender skin. The pressure runs on the mind-melting boarder between a tickle and pain that has heat pooling between his legs and racing back up his spine. “Doumeki!” He whines, breathless and fighting to keep his knees from collapsing. He grasps at the walls and his hand falls serendipitously on something especially familiar._

_A fully formed plan of attack springs almost instantaneously into being._

_And He’ll implement it._

_Any second now._

_Just… maybe he’ll let Doumeki keep going for a little while longer. See where he’s going with this._

_Turns out where he’s going is Watanuki collapsed and shaking around his shoulders, moaning throatily as he sucks a dark hicky into the hollow just inside of his hipbone._

Watanuki’s arms tightened around his legs and his blush deepened still further. As much as it disgusted his mind to see Doumeki doing this to him, his body seemed all for it. He shut his eyes tight and breathed in deeply, doing his utmost to calm down. Yuuko and Mokona were saying something, probably teasing and inflammatory, but he didn’t care. He’d be getting made fun of for this for the foreseeable future, anyway. “Hey.” Watanuki started at the hand on his back.

“WHAT?!” He demanded, whirling around and scrambling away. His heart hammered against his ribs as he looked at Doumeki. He felt distinctly hot in the face, but he couldn’t look away. Doumeki’s hand was still outstretched and he flexed his fingers. Watanuki swallowed.

“It’s getting a little chilly, don’t you think?” Yuuko asked, tilting her head to the side. “Let’s take this inside.”

“Yeah, whatever, sure,” Watanuki replied under his breath.

“And we’re out of sake!” Mokona added, raising his empty glass and looking cross.

“I’ll get something from the kitchen,” Watanuki sighed heavily. He made to pick up Doumeki’s empty sake glass right as he reached for it himself. Their hands touched, and they looked at each other.

“Our wish granter is such an _asshole_ ,” Yuuko said quietly to Mokona, who smiled in excited agreement. “Maru and Moro will see to all of this, Watanuki-kun,” she told him, smiling. Watanuki withdrew his hand and stood up, feeling slightly shivery. Maybe it really _was_ cold outside.

“Fine,” he said, and he hurried back inside. Doumeki looked quickly at Yuuko, who smiled an impassive smile, then followed him.

In the kitchen, Watanuki stood with his hands on the counter, breathing deeply. It was just a fanfiction, and it made him irrationally angry that someone would write about him in that situation! The fetish superhero part was totally fine; he’d done far crazier things working for Yuuko-san, but everything else was just- “Hey.”

“I told you my name’s not ‘hey!’” Watanuki snapped, though it seemed all the fire and energy he had for screaming and fighting with Doumeki had burned out. He sighed and opened the cupboards, looking for the hot sake cups.

“Watanuki.” He turned at last and looked Doumeki in the face. Outside in the darkness he hadn’t seen, but in the warm light of the kitchen he saw Doumeki was blushing. It was _faint_ , but it was definitely there.

“What’s with you?” Watanuki asked, rather aggressively, digging in the cupboards. Doumeki leaned against the counter, his arms crossed, watching but not speaking. “What?!” Watanuki demanded, placing cups and a carafe on a tray. Still Doumeki said nothing. Watanuki sighed and stood right in front of Doumeki. “You’re in front of the cupboard I need,” he said, irritably. Doumeki looked him right in the eye, but kept silent. Watanuki swallowed, and in spite of himself he remembered the fanfiction, of what had happened when they’d been this close to each other. He had a fleeting vision of Doumeki lifting him up onto the counter, gripping his hips and standing between his spread legs…

“Sorry,” Doumeki said, at last breaking their gaze and moving out of the way. Watanuki let out an irritated growl and clenched his fists. This was Doumeki, what was the matter with him?! Hot disgust surged inside him as he reached into the cupboard and pulled out a bottle of sake. There was no need for anything fancy from the liquor cabinet, not for this. He walked over to the stove to heat it up, wishing Doumeki would go away, his heart beating against his ribs. “Do you know how this fanfiction is supposed to end?” Doumeki asked, after a while. Watanuki shuddered.

“Obviously not,” he spat. “Yuuko-san didn’t tell me anything before this all started.

“Oh.”

“Don’t just say ‘oh’ like it’s no big deal!” Watanuki snapped, angry color rising in his face.

“Well, it’s not,” Doumeki replied, evenly. Watanuki spun around, a look of utmost indignation on his face.

“EASY FOR YOU TO SAY! YOU DIDN’T-” He stopped talking abruptly and turned back to the sake, making sure it didn’t boil.

“Didn’t what?”

“YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!” Watanuki blushed, furious and embarrassed. Neither of them spoke for a while, and Watanuki wondered if Doumeki was remembering too, then felt disgusting. More silence. The sake was _just_ about to simmer and Watanuki took it of the stove and poured it into the carafe. Immediately Doumeki appeared at his side and reached for a cup. “PUT THAT DOWN!” Watanuki screamed, but Doumeki had already poured himself a cup full. He paused, eyes locked on Watanuki’s, and took a sip.

“Here,” Doumeki said, warding off the explosion.

“W-what?!” Watanuki’s eyes darted back and forth between the cup and Doumeki’s face. Again, he saw what might have been a blush, but it was probably just from the alcohol. “No thank you,” he said, with as much dignity as he could muster. Doumeki paused.

“It’s better if you don’t, you can’t hold your liquor anyway,” he said, his tone as blunt as ever. Anger flashed inside Watanuki and he seized the cup and drank it. A new heat rushed up his face and neck, but he slammed the cup back onto the tray, staring at Doumeki, who stared back. Silence fell between them again.

“Watanuki-kun! What’s taking so long?!” Came Yuuko’s voice suddenly from down the hall. Watanuki and Doumeki both looked up.

“I’ll be right there, Yuuko-san!” Watanuki cried, grabbing the tray and hurrying out of the room. He felt Doumeki’s eyes on the back of his neck as he hurried down the hall. He should have known better than to keep Yuuko-san from her liquor, if that idiot Doumeki hadn’t held him up! He could still feel how deeply he was blushing, how fast his heart was beating, but he tried to ignore it all, feeling angry at everybody.

Watanuki and Doumeki entered one of Yuuko’s small, private parlors. Maru and Moro had set up the projector on a table in the center, and Watanuki set the tray down next to it. “Hot sake, provided by the ever-giving Watanuki-sama!” He exclaimed, a hand on his chest.

“It’s about time!” Mokona cried, hopping off of Yuuko’s lap and hurrying to pour the cups.

“ _He_ kept getting under my feet,” Watanuki growled, eyeing Doumeki malevolently.

“Oh, that’s the part of you he was under?” Yuuko asked, accepting a cup from Mokona with a wicked grin.

“YUUKO-SAN!” She laughed lightly.

“Sit down, we still have fanfiction to enjoy!” She said, toasting Mokona. Watanuki sighed and made to sit down, but,

“NO.” All of the seats in the room were taken except for the one on the couch facing the screen. Doumeki was already sitting there, sake in hand and deadpan expression on his face.

“Wow, this wish granter _is_ an asshole,” Mokona said quietly to Yuuko, sipping his drink in satisfaction.

“Right?” She whispered back, then, “Relax, Watanuki, we’re about halfway through, it won’t be for long!” Watanuki closed his eyes, praying for patience, then sat down on the couch as far as possible from Doumeki, curling up into a tight, irritated ball.

“Yay! Fanfiction time, fanfiction time!” Maru and Moro cried, before restarting the projector.

_They lose balance. Collapse onto the carpeted floor in a tangle of limbs. Doumeki wrestles to get Watanuki undressed (with which he cooperates) and then wrestles to get on top of him (with which he most certainly does not)._

Watanuki covered his face with his hands and moaned in anguish. They were only halfway through and this was what was happening?! “Here,” Doumeki said, grabbing hold of the blanket on the back of the couch and throwing it over Watanuki. “Hide under this if it’s too scary.”

“I’M NOT SCARED! I JUST DON’T WANT TO SEE A CREEP LIKE YOU-” but he broke off, unable to finish the sentence. He covered himself with the blanket and curled into a tighter ball, glowering at the screen. He knew Doumeki was still watching him.

_The struggle does nothing but excite them further as they push and pin, growl and writhe. Doumeki doesn’t even realize he’s losing until mid-maneuver he hears a metallic ratchet and something closes firmly around his wrist. It’s only another moment before Watanuki drags his other hand up and it happens a second time. Doumeki looks up from where he’s on his back on the floor. His wrists are both bound in gently padded but tightly fixed handcuffs that have been threaded through the lowest in a track full of shelves that runs up the wall._

“WHAT?!” Watanuki exclaimed, looking wildly around to make sure everyone else had seen it too.

“Ooh, this _is_ exciting!” Yuuko cried, pouring herself another drink.

“Doumeki in handcuffs! Doumeki in handcuffs!” Maru and Moro sang.

“I’d never have thought, Watanuki-kun!” Yuuko continued, grinning at him slyly. Watanuki looked at her, wide eyed, and cursed himself for blushing.

“This is just fanfiction!” He said, hastily, wrapping the blanket more tightly around himself and turning away.

“What does Doumeki-kun think?” Yuuko asked pointedly, and Watanuki looked at him out of the corner of his eye. Doumeki took a thoughtful sip of sake, then shrugged unconcernedly.

“THAT’S ALL?!” Watanuki cried, in spite of himself.

“Don’t I keep telling you only idiots get angry over fanfiction?” Doumeki said, his hands over his ears. Watanuki let out a frustrated cry and sank back into the couch, staring at the screen.

_His eyes snap back to Watanuki where he’s sitting on his chest, looking down with a slowly growing grin, relishing his victory. They’re both still breathing heavily and the sound fills the room. With the clink of chain, Doumeki tests the bonds._

_They hold fast._

_On his chest Watanuki’s eyes go wide and he starts stroking himself._

Watanuki’s eyes widened and he went furiously red. “When did I-”

“Shh!” Yuuko and Mokona hissed. Watanuki looked away, feeling utterly exposed. He couldn’t believe someone would write about him doing this, and that other people were seeing it! He felt Doumeki shift next to him and chanced a glance at him out of the corner of his eye. His gaze was fixed upon the screen and his knuckles were white around his cup of sake. Maybe it did bother him…?

_“Come closer.”_

_And with a quirk of his lips, Watanuki does, shuffling forward on his knees but holding his length teasingly just out of reach of Doumeki’s mouth._

_“Unlock the cuffs.” Doumeki insists._

_But Watanuki just looks down at him in delight, hand working himself faster. “No.” He sighed._

_“Let me touch you!”_

_“No!” It’s a groan that coincides with the way a bead of pearly wetness slides down the side of his cock._

_Driven to frustration, Doumeki glares up at him as he drags a hot, wet tongue carefully around the side of one of his balls. Watanuki gasps loudly and the shudder rips through his entire body. Doumeki arches up, painfully aroused, thrusting into nothingness and knocks him off balance. Watanuki catches himself with his free hand inches from Doumeki’s face._

_“Doumeki.” He pants, eyes blown wide. “Suck me off.”_

_“I’m trying, idiot!”_

“Sounds like you two,” Yuuko said, bizarrely sounding affectionate. Watanuki let out a sputter of fury, his entire body hot with his blush. He felt beyond humiliated at being forced to watch this, at Yuuko-san and Mokona and Maru and Moro seeing it, at Doumeki… Watanuki looked over at him, and noticed the tiniest of flushes in his face, though his expression was the same as ever. It was hard to imagine him turned on at all, much less as turned on as he was in this fanfiction, but there he was _so_ hard, so into it, so eager to please, and Watanuki had made him feel this way. He’d also handcuffed him to the floor, which, despite his horror, made him feel powerful and, was it excited?

“They’re quiet, Yuuko-san!” Mokona said in a stage whisper.

“Shut up!” Watanuki snapped. No. As much as he’d love to put Doumeki in his place, he wouldn’t do it _this_ way. He wouldn’t do anything like this with Doumeki!

_Watanuki guides himself in with a shaking hand and it’s over almost before it begins. Doumeki’s full lips wrap around his shaft, sucking him deeper, tongue writhing back to tease across his slit a few times before pressing him firm between his rolling tongue and hard palate. The sensation rips through Watanuki and it’s the greatest feeling in the world to give himself over to that wet, needy heat. He comes with a broken scream, rolling himself against the roof of Doumeki’s willing mouth as the heat spills out of him. It’s only when the last aftershocks have died away that he retreats, doing so with a whimper when Doumeki sucks him clean in the process, one last assault on over sensitive nerves._

“That was fast!” Mokona cried, finishing his sake.

“SHUT UP!” Watanuki yelled, surprised no one else could feel the heat radiating from his blush.

“That was fast! That was fast!”

“See, aren’t you glad Doumeki’s always here?” Yuuko said, smiling slyly. “He keeps the spirits away _and_ makes you come hard!”

“YUUKO-SAN!” Watanuki snapped back, wishing more than anything to disappear on the spot.

“You seemed to enjoy yourself in the story, though,” Yuuko pointed out, also finishing her sake.

“THIS IS JUST FANFICTION! I’D NEVER ACTUALLY DO ANY OF THIS!” Yuuko nodded thoughtfully.

“And what about you, Doumeki-kun?” Yuuko asked, curiously, tilting her head to the side. Doumeki shifted his position on the couch, appearing to debate the question.

“I-” a sudden knocking sounded from the front door and everyone looked up.

“A customer! It must be a customer!” Maru and Moro cried excitedly as they sprung up and sprinted down the hall. Yuuko sighed heavily and got to her feet.

“Mokona will pause-”

“No no it’s fine, this is a cheap plot device the wish granter needs; keep the fic running,” she told Mokona discreetly.

“Oh, gotcha. Let’s go see who’s at the door!” He jumped up on Yuuko’s shoulder and she headed back down the hall. Silence.

“I-” Doumeki began, but, Watanuki interrupted.

“Just keep watching.” Doumeki inched closer to him on the couch, but Watanuki kept his gaze straight ahead.

_He crawls back, entirely off Doumeki, to land boneless with his back to the column of the pedestal. They eye each other from the new distance, one gaze significantly more serene than the other. Then Watanuki lets his head fall back and his eyes fall closed in a huff. His body sings with bliss. It’s like he can feel the Brownian motion of the universe and his whole body vibrates to it, feels alive with it. He smiles, wide and easy._

_“Oi!”_

_His eyes slide open but he does not move._

_“What?”_  
  
_Doumeki looks pointedly to where his own member is straining, then back to Watanuki._

_Who just shrugs and pantomimes weighing his options. “I don’t know…”_

_“YOU DON’T KNOW?” Doumeki thunders, an impressive attempt at intimidation for someone chained to the floor and hard in his pants._

Watanuki felt a rush of that same powerful feeling as before and bit his lip. He’d never seen himself keep his cool around Doumeki this way; normally he’d fly into rages over pretty much anything. Here, though, he was the one in control, and Doumeki was the one raising his voice, frustrated and discomposed. He remembered how the fic had began, with Doumeki shoving him up against a wall, touching and kissing and teasing, and a shock of excitement surged through him. He shifted under the blanket, willing his body to relax. Both scenarios were exciting for completely different reasons, as much as he hated to admit it, even if it was with Doumeki…

He wondered suddenly how Doumeki was feeling, if he was feeling as embarrassed as Watanuki but was just better at hiding it. He turned, and found Doumeki watching him. “What?” Watanuki demanded, the snap in his voice duller than usual. They stared at each other for a few, painful seconds.

“Give me some of he blanket.”

“No!” But Doumeki seized an end and pulled, covering himself. Watanuki glared at him indignantly, but Doumeki just stared back impassively. They were much closer together now, and heat seemed to rise between them. Watanuki snapped his gaze back to the screen, making an irritated noise in his throat.

_“You did call me ‘boy wonder’.” Watanuki’s eyes narrow. “That was very rude of you.”_

_Doumeki screws his eyes shut then tears them open again. “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it.”_

“I like you in this fanfiction,” Watanuki said, before he could stop himself.

“Oh?”

“Yes, begging for my forgiveness, you should try it in real life!” Watanuki forged bravely on with an attempt at his old, snappish tone.

“You’re the one leaving me hanging, that’s way worse than whatever I did.”

“You called me a sidekick!”

“You are a sidekick.” Watanuki was about to retort, but Doumeki forestalled him. “I’d never leave you hanging.” Watanuki’s breath caught in his throat and he stared back at Doumeki.

“We’d never end up in this type of situation, you can’t tell a guy stuff like that!” He cursed himself for blushing again and for how much higher his voice sounded. Doumeki just shrugged, his expression the same as ever, and returned his gaze to the screen.

_“I’m not a sidekick.”_

_“No! Of course not! I don’t know why I said that. I’m sorry, I- Watanuki,_ please _.”_

Doumeki moved even closer and their thighs touched under the blanket. Watanuki’s stomach muscles pulled in and up and he let out a sharp exhale, feeling both horrified and, for some reason, excited. What was going on?! He tried to speak, but anything he might have said got lost his throat. He kept hearing “Watanuki, _please_ ” reverberate inside his head, and even though it was Doumeki’s voice, it was _erotic_.

 _Doumeki isn’t the most loquacious of lovers, but Watanuki has found if he gets him desperate,_ _really_ _desperate, sometimes that low, steady voice of his will start to babble._

“Is that true?” Watanuki asked, very quietly, without meaning to. He swallowed and looked away.

“So it would seem,” Doumeki replied, just as quietly, and Watanuki let out another sharp exhale as heat pooled between his legs. He shut his eyes tight, willing his body to relax, but it was no good. He prayed Doumeki wouldn’t notice.

_With a grin he reaches up lazily and hits a hidden button on the underside of the pedestal’s rim. Machinery hums to life and the shelving unit Doumeki is attached to starts to ascend. He has to scrabble awkwardly to keep up. Watanuki stops it when Doumeki is stood all the way up, arms stretched out above him. But then he notices the way he’s standing on the balls of his feet and dials the track back down again so he can stand more comfortably. When Doumeki laughs under his breath at this nicety, he glares and reverses it right back to where it was. If the big lug thinks he can handle the strain, fine, let him._

“Good,” Watanuki said, coldly, as heat surged to fuel his erection.

“I dug under hydrangea bushes in the rain for an entire day for you,” Doumeki reminded him. “This is nothing.” Watanuki bit his lip and looked away. Why did he have to bring that up now? When they were in this incredibly compromising position? When they were all alone and vulnerable? When Doumeki placed his hand on Watanuki’s thigh?

“What-”

“Is this okay?” Doumeki asked, very quietly. Watanuki looked him in the face, and felt his erection, and heart, throb with excitement. He could see the beginnings of what the fanfiction had described: his desperation, his need, his desire. Had Watanuki really brought that out of him? Was that something he even _wanted_ to bring out of him?

“Yes,” he said, just as quietly. Apparently so.

_He pushes himself up to standing. Forsakes Doumeki and his waiting arousal in favor of perusing one of his walls. Their tussling had knocked a few things out of place and he fixes them now._

_“Hmm…” Watanuki muses. “So many choices.” He weighs the heft of a throwing knife in his hand and flips it easily in his hand before setting it back to right. “No…” He takes two batons and touches them together, an arc of electricity burning between them and causing the smell of ozone to fill the room. He looks over his shoulder to gauge Doumeki’s reaction. “Ok, not today apparently.” Then his hand falls on a short leather whip. He twists it a few times in his hand, keeping the rotation tight in the small room and then cracks it low to the floor. Doumeki’s hands are fisted in their restraints and he appears to no longer be breathing. “Oh? Did you_ _like_ _that, darling?” Watanuki asks, voice dripping sin._

“Are you really into all this stuff?” Doumeki asked.

“I’m into having you at my mercy,” Watanuki replied, coldly, though rather breathlessly. Doumeki made a soft, appreciative noise in his throat and brought his hand further up Watanuki’s thigh, dangerously close to his erection. Watanuki closed his eyes and exhaled softly, then blushed and turned away.

_He gathers the leather as he saunters forward a few steps, doubling it back on itself and pulling it tight with a snap._

_He closes in and uses the handle to force Doumeki’s chin up, leaving him exposed, adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows tightly._

_“Well, I hope you’re ready, sweetheart. Because I’m about to-“_

_An alarm rips through the air and for a moment the room flashes purple._

_Watanuki’s eyes go wide. “Shit, shit, shit!”_

“What?!” Watanuki cried out, staring wide eyed at the screen.

“Relax,” Doumeki told him, calmly.

_He scrambles to find his discarded pants and pulls his phone out of the back pocket. The room falls to silence as he unlocks the screen and dismisses an alert. He leaves it on the pedestal as he starts pulling on the flexible undersuit of his uniform. It goes on easily and he zips it up the front. His wrist communicator is already vibrating with a call. He brings it up to just under his chin and presses it with his left hand to activate it. “Come in Swallowtail. Do you read me?”_

_“Loud and clear, Enigma. We’ve got a code green in sector seven. I want an ETA of fifteen minutes. Can you confirm?”_

_Watanuki turns to look apologetically over his shoulder. Doumeki’s face is hard to describe. Shock, but still laboring under the burden of arousal and very slowly realizing the potential horror of the situation._

“If you leave me hanging…” Doumeki breathed, right in Watanuki’s ear, and he let out a soft gasp.

“What are you talking about?” Watanuki asked, trying valiantly for his old impatient tone, but sounding lustful and longing instead. He blushed furiously, but before he could look away Doumeki grabbed his wrist with his other hand. “I,” he looked Doumeki in the face as he brought his hand between his legs. Watanuki gasped and a violent shiver ran through his body as he felt Doumeki’s erection, hard and needy, under the fabric of his pants. Watanuki felt his own erection throb with excitement and his heart rate sped up sharply. “Are you serious?”

“Obviously.” Doumeki let go of Watanuki’s wrist, but Watanuki kept his hand where it was, rubbing it back and forth ever so gently. Doumeki closed his eyes and gently pressed his hips forward, looking for more friction. Watanuki’s mouth went dry and he swallowed, trying to collect himself, but he’d never felt more powerful or more turned on in his life and he had no idea what to do about it. Doumeki opened his eyes again and stared back at him, the faintest blush in his face and neck. He slid his hand into Watanuki’s hip crease, the same spot from earlier. “You like being touched here, right?” Doumeki asked, and Watanuki bit his lip, then nodded.

_“Enigma? Can you confirm?”_

_He sighs. “Negative, Swallowtail. Expect a delay of give or take five minutes.”_

_There is heavy silence on the other end of the line. Then, “Really?”_

_“Yes, really!” He snaps defensively._

_“Why?”_

_“JUST BECAUSE. OK? HOW ABOUT YOU RESPECT MY PRIVACY FOR ONCE?”_

_His left hand falls away and the communicator lapses into silence. For a few moments he just fumes, staring at the wall._

_“Hey…” Doumeki says gently. “Are you-“_

“Can I…?” Doumeki asked, slowly, running his fingers under the waistband of Watanuki’s pants. Watanuki bit down on his lip to keep himself from crying out. Pleasure rippled out through his body from Doumeki’s touches, and he thrust his hips forward into the sensations. He couldn’t look at Doumeki, but he couldn’t say no.

“Yes.”

_But Watanuki’s gaze snaps back to him and cuts him off. “We don’t have much time.”_

_“Yeah, I’m getting that.”_

_Watanuki closes the distance, hands to either side of Doumeki’s neck, frowning apologetically. “Sorry about this.”_

_“It’s cool.” Doumeki assures him. “I wasn’t really that into getting whipped anyway.”_

_Watanuki just grins and nudges their noses together. “I wasn’t going to actually whip you.” He admits. “Just get you a little worried.”_

“That’s reassuring,” Doumeki breathed, right into Watanuki’s ear. Watanuki groaned softly as Doumeki undid his pants and took hold of his erection. He bit his lip and shut his eyes tight, still not quite believing this was happening but too far gone to care. His hand shook as he continued to palm Doumeki’s erection through his pants, but, “You don’t have to.” Watanuki opened his eyes, fresh heat surging up his neck.

“Are you sure?” Doumeki nodded and began to stroke Watanuki’s erection, and he had to clap his hand over his mouth to keep from crying out.

_“This is great and all, but… I mean, five minutes right? Four and a half now?”_

_Watanuki nods, pressing a kiss against his cheek before sliding down, kneeling at his feet. He makes short work of the buckle and pulls his fly open. Watanuki didn’t exactly have a working knowledge of Doumeki’s underwear yet, but this pair was a particular favorite of his. Nicer than the conservative grays and blacks he tended towards._

_“Aww!” He cooes up at him, pulling the pants halfway down his thighs. It doesn’t make standing any easier for Doumeki but his ease of movement isn’t exactly Watanuki’s priority right now. “You wore the maroon ones!”_

_“You said you liked them.” Doumeki averts his gaze._

_Watanuki blushes pink against the black of his mask. Doumeki had remembered. And he’d worn them. For_ _him_ _._

_Watanuki lets his hands trail along the patch of bare thigh he’d uncovered, appreciating the way Doumeki’s hardness strains against the fabric. The way the tip is already staining dark with wetness. He wants to tease him. To nuzzle at him through the cotton until he begs. But there just isn’t the time. He pulls the fabric down instead._

_“Doumeki.” He prompts, and the man in question looks back to him. Watanuki wraps one hand firm around his base and it is with a sweet smile that he guides the weeping head of his cock between his lips. Doumeki wants to watch. Wants nothing else more. But it’s just too much._

_The blue of his eyes. The mask. His kiss swollen lips. The pink tongue that slides out to torture him. The hair. The eyelashes. He can’t- He-_

_He has to look away. Gather his courage. Steal another glance. The pattern repeats._

_Watanuki must know. Has to know. He pulls away with a teasing smile only to come back and murmur against his shaft, “What’s wrong, dear?” Eyes wide and blinking up at him innocently._

Watanuki tried to watch himself in the story, but he couldn’t, not with Doumeki pleasing him this way. Ridiculous and strange as this situation was, Watanuki felt _so_ turned on, and he didn’t want to have the hair trigger here like he had in the story. He wanted to draw it out, make Doumeki to work for his pleasure.

Doumeki kept going, pleasing him in hard, fast strokes, then leaned forward and nuzzled gently into his neck, behind his ear. Watanuki shivered and his erection throbbed, the tender sensations magnified by his desperate need. _How_ did this feel so good? How had he even let this happen? “Let’s watch this next part,” Doumeki breathed, right in his ear, before kissing him softly just below it. Watanuki swallowed another, desperate groan, but opened his eyes, watching himself on the screen.

_The question is rhetorical but Doumeki is too out of it and can’t help but answer anyway._

_“You’re too beautiful.” He says desperately, and Watanuki grins against him, hand starting to pump and tongue dragging luxuriously across the head. “You… I want to kiss you. Want to fuck you. Want to come all over that pretty face of yours.”_

Doumeki pressed his lips against Watanuki’s flushed, sweaty neck and inhaled sharply, the words pulsing through both of them. He rubbed his thumb around the head of his erection before moving his hand up and down again, much faster now.

_Watanuki freezes, then continues a little more earnestly, wrapping his lips around him. “Wanna mess up your hair. Wanna see myself drip down your chin.” Watanuki’s eyes are wide now. Wide and intense and unbelieving and so, so blue. “Want you to close your eyes so I can come all over that mask of yours. White on black. So gorgeous.” And he does close his eyes, not to fulfill his fantasy but to suck hard at him, fist pumping against him at speed until it’s too much. Doumeki breaks with a quiet gasp and a low groan and Watanuki does not pull away until the final drop leaves him._

“O- _oh_ my,” Watanuki gasped, the words sending waves of hot pleasure coursing through his body. He’d never heard anything like that before, and he’d never expected Doumeki to speak to anyone, much less him, that way. He felt beyond embarrassed at how much effect the words were having on him, but at that moment he didn’t care. Doumeki took his lips away from his neck and Watanuki turned to him. He rested his forehead against his, their lips millimeters apart.

_“Shit!” Doumeki curses with relish and appreciation._

_Watanuki stands quickly, pulling Doumeki into a ferocious kiss and leaving him with a mouthful of semen._

Watanuki let out a soft cry, the lewdness of the act taking him completely by surprise but fueling his arousal to an almost painful degree. He was close, but he didn’t want to say so, that would be far too much. He felt Doumeki’s breath on his own lips and his hand tighten around his erection. “I want to taste you,” Doumeki whispered, so softly Watanuki almost missed it, but it was just enough.

He kissed Doumeki full on the lips, moaning into his mouth as he came, hard, into his hand. He shuddered violently as all the heat and pressure and tension between his legs rushed outwards. Doumeki moaned softly too, thrusting his tongue into his mouth, pleasing him until there was nothing left.

 _While he’s dealing with the shock of that, Watanuki hisses into his ear. “Just a word of warning: If we’re ever doing that again and you get anything on my mask, even the slightest drop, I will_ _eviscerate_ _you. There will_ _be_ _no body to find.”_

_It shouldn’t be hot. Shouldn’t make him shudder the way it does._

_“I thought you were a good guy.”_

_Watanuki leans in, fisting Doumeki’s hair and dragging him down. They kiss filthily, the cloudy bitterness stretching thin between their tongues as he pulls back away._

Doumeki pulled out of their kiss, breathing heavily, then took his hand away. Watanuki let out a soft cry and looked Doumeki in the face. Even though his mind was hazy with satisfaction, he realized what he was about to do and shivered in excitement. Before Doumeki’s tongue could touch his fingers, however, Watanuki grabbed his wrist and brought his hand to his own mouth. Without breaking eye contact, Watanuki took Doumeki’s fingers into his mouth, one by one, sucking them clean and tasting himself.

Doumeki gasped and flushed, actually flushed, his gaze burning and lustful, and it gave Watanuki such a rush. The second he was done, Doumeki pulled him into another kiss, thrusting his tongue into his mouth and moaning gratefully. It took Watanuki completely by surprise, but he kissed him back enthusiastically. He already felt like he could go again soon, like the recovery time he usually needed was suddenly totally unnecessary. He had no idea what was going on, but he didn’t care. His head was spinning, and _all_ he wanted was more.

 _“I am a_ _very_ _good guy.” Watanuki clarifies, should there be any doubt. “But there are some things that are just unforgivable.”_

_Watanuki touches an electronic release to the cuffs and Doumeki is grateful for the way he seems to anticipate his muscle fatigue, catching his arms and guiding them down with a minimum of pain. Then he is away, piecing together his armor and pulling on his gloves and boots. Still leaning against the wall, Doumeki does his own redressing._

Watanuki and Doumeki weren’t even paying attention to the fanfiction anymore, they were so absorbed in each other. Kissing passionately, arms around each other, heads spinning and bodies on fire, it was-

“ _Finally_ they left!” Doumeki and Watanuki stopped right where they were, gave each other a terrified look, then broke apart. They scurried to opposite ends of the couch, though they stayed under the blanket, concealing evidence of what had just happened. “Sorry that took so long,” Yuuko said, wearily, sauntering back into the room, Mokona on her shoulder and Maru and Moro in toe. “What did we miss?” She asked, looking from Watanuki, to Doumeki, to the screen still showing the fic.

“Nothing!” Watanuki snapped. Having everyone else back in the room had reminded him what was actually going on. He had been watching a fanfiction for one of Yuuko-san’s customers. A fanfiction about him and Doumeki, where they had… He flushed deeply, still feeling pleasure echoing in his body. Had all that really happened? Had he let Doumeki… And they had kissed? And he had been so turned on he couldn’t see straight?

“I think the fic is nearly over. Let’s finish it and call it a night!” Yuuko said, excitedly.

“Yes!” Mokona agreed, and he and Yuuko took their seats again.

“Finish the fic! Finish the fic!”

_“You can hang out here until I get back if you want.” Watanuki offers. It’s a big step. He’s never left Doumeki in his house alone. “Did you eat before?” Back at the restaurant where he’d missed their date._

_“No.”_

_“Ok, there should be leftovers in the fridge if you want. Careful if you make anything. I have a gas stove. Make sure you don’t leave it on or-“_

_Doumeki pulls him away from where he is hooking a seemingly endless supply of equipment into his belt and fretting. He silences that moving mouth by pressing his own lips against it. “Stop worrying. I know how to use a microwave.”_

_“Just don’t break anything, ok?”_

_“I’m not going to break anything.”_

_“And don’t mess with my stuff in here. At least half of it could kill you and I’m going to be really pissed if you die.”_

_“I promise.”_

“Watanuki is so concerned!” Yuuko cooed, clasping her hands together. Watanuki didn’t have the energy to respond, so he just gave her a nasty look. Yuuko pouted her lips and exchanged a disappointed glance with Mokona.

_Watanuki checks himself over one last time. All his equipment is in place. He walks out of the closet and to the bedroom window, preferring this exit over the more conventional one. He slips one leg out then hesitates. “See you when I get back?”_

_Doumeki meets him with a goodbye kiss that is firm but short. “I’ll be waiting.”_

_He tries to track Watanuki as he leaves, but his black suit is perfect camouflage and he simply melts into the shadows._

The fic ended, and Yuuko, Mokona, Maru and Moro burst into applause.

“Is this wish over with?” Watanuki demanded, irritably, trying to discreetly zip up under the blanket. Yuuko smiled.

“So it would seem! Our wish granter seems satisfied and our customer is thrilled!”

“Good,” Watanuki muttered, resentfully. Yuuko stood up and stretched.

“Well, I’m exhausted,” she said, theatrically, shutting off the projector, and the room went almost completely dark. “I’d like a bath before I turn in, Watanuki-kun.” Watanuki sighed grumpily.

“I’ll be right there, Yuuko-san.”

“In the mean time, let’s have a nightcap!” Mokona cried enthusiastically, and Yuuko laughed appreciatively.

“Naturally! Will you join us, Doumeki-kun?” Watanuki turned to Doumeki, who had said nothing since Yuuko and the others had returned. He shrugged.

“Sure.”

“Yay!” Maru and Moro cried, and they tried to grab his arms and pull him to his feet, but,

“Leave him be, Maru, Moro,” Yuuko said, reproachfully. “He’ll be with us in a second. Come on!” She took each of them by the hand and walked out of the room, Mokona back on her shoulder. Watanuki sighed heavily and finally peeled himself off the couch, feeling sticky and uncomfortable and desperately awkward all of a sudden. He heard Doumeki stand up and sigh too, trying to collect himself.

“Hey.”

“My name’s not ‘hey,’” Watanuki reminded him, though there was no irritation in his voice now. He turned and faced Doumeki, trying and failing not to blush.

“Watanuki.”

“What?” Watanuki could just see him in the light spilling in from the hall, his stoic eyes suddenly shining with meaning in the half darkness. He stepped forward and kissed Watanuki on the lips, making him shiver excitedly. They broke apart fairly quickly, but remained close together, sharing breath and energy. “Do you want to stay over?” Watanuki asked, before he could stop himself.

“Are you sure?”

“Of course I’m sure,” Watanuki replied, rather impatiently. Doumeki smiled a small smile and kissed Watanuki again.

“Yes.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!
> 
> I think about reviews when I summon my kekkai, leave me some!


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